Be nice to Harvard (at least be creative)

[billhoward]

Is this whole how-much-can-I-hate-Harvard (and-what-can-my-sign-say) issue getting out of hand, or is it one more way for Big Red partisans to be creative in the dead of winter when Ithaca can be a bleak place?

On the other hand, Harvard still sucks ... and after Saturday's game Harvard still runs the world outside hockey just as it did before the game. Other than the part Melody Davidson seems to be running quite nicely in Torino.

Cornell fans might bow to the gods of perceived censorship and just use first letters for any possibly offensive words. Sometimes the viewer reads in more than is actually there. Example: For a sorority skit, my girlfriend sang the Lerner & Lowe song "I Could Have Danced All Night" and bleeped out appropriate passages: "I could have [silent pause] all night / I could have [silence] all night / And still have begged for more / I could have spread my [silence] / And done a thousand things / I'd never done before."

Any sign with B***, C****, F**** (that's not nice), or S*** is going to be read multiple ways, and there must be other letters of the alphabet, too. The ushers will be running around with pocket copies of the Dictionary of American Slang trying to figure out who to toss and what bad word is represented by J***. Which has the downside of suggesting to the townspeople ushers that wise-ass Cornell students are making fun of them. (Townies can be hockey fans, too.)

If there are Harvard fans and if they show up, that takes more guts coming into the clutches of Lynah than 500 Cornellians taking over Bright. Plus the Cantabs have that long lonely ride back to Boston. Especially when one says, "What's that odd smell coming from under the hood ... like a cooking fish?"

If I were a Harvard fan, I'd carry a sign,
"$25.9B [small letters:] life's winning team"
"$3.3B losing team"


In signmaking, Cornell fans might consider sore spots with the Cantabs: their fear that grade inflation makes a Harvard A-grade dubious and a B equates to a D anywhere else. (Use the "Give me an A ... give me another A" cheer.) Then there's the president, Larry Summers, but his troubles with the faculty seem hard to satirize on a single sign. Since the game is on TV, do you want your sign to be seen across the nation? Then clean up your act. The networks are always suckers for signs that use the network acronym, like (this is about as meek as could be) ...
C ornell
S oars
T o
V ictory
(now fix our webcasts, please)

After the game, at least one Cornell fan ought to tell a Harvard fan how much we all appreciate their putting in an appearance and cheering their team on. That would be an act of true sportsmanship. (That could also disorient J. Winthrop III long enough that another Faithful can steal up behind and liberate JW III's  Harvard cap.)

For a small investment, one might go out to the parking lot and put Cornell Big Red license plate surrounds on cars with Harvard decals. It's hard to charge someone with vandalism for adding accessories to a car, so long as you don't use two-part epoxy.

A couple hundred of us will be cheering you on from Philadelphia. LGR!

[A-19]

harvard has no fans, bill. the majority of people in section O will be cornellians who bought tix from harvard undergrads.

have fun at CACO

[Killer]

Give me a B...
Give me another B...
Throw in a C...

Welcome to Harvard, Mr. Bush.

[Trotsky]

Dear NBC,

It's Turin.  It's not Torino.  It wasn't the Moscova Olympics, it wasn't the ÁèÞíá Olympica, so it isn't Torino.

Also, there are other countries competing than the US.  However, do put the Johnson sisters curling team on more, because they are cute.

[ajec1]

[quote billhoward] The networks are always suckers for signs that use the network acronym, like (this is about as meek as could be) ...
C ornell
S oars
T o
V ictory
(now fix our webcasts, please)

[/quote]

Don't be that guy...no one likes that guy. Anyone caught with a sign similar to this should be accosted by the entire faithful. Nothing says, "I'm a moron, put me on tv" like making a sign using the letters of the network.

[Trotsky]

[quote billhoward]Since the game is on TV, do you want your sign to be seen across the nation? Then clean up your act. The networks are always suckers for signs that use the network acronym, like (this is about as meek as could be) ...
C ornell
S oars
T o
V ictory
[/quote]

So you're asking me to leave my

C antabs
S uck.
T hat's
V eritas.

sign at home?

[Killer]

Love it.  You absolutely MUST bring that one!

[billhoward]

C ornell
S oars
T o
V ictory
(now fix our webcasts, please)

Give me a break! I worked hard to make this one as bad as could possibly be. Like: Nebraska Buffaloes Colorado -- Go Huskers!  Think Bulwer-Lytton Ficton Writing Contest http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/ and below.

Real options:

1) Make it half witty (opposite of above). This is still mediocre ...
Cornell Sticks It To HarVard
... but it gets you on TV and the pun is actually quite advanced for televison.  

2) Make it witty and then when you're on camera, flip the sign real quick with something more to the point on the back: A real insult to Harvard or something about the quality of CSTV's webcasts.

In fact, if the back of every sign said "CSTV - Fix the Webcasts" maybe the producer in the control room (um, how sophisticated is CSTV?) would get the message and pass it back. Of course, once a couple people do the flip-the-sign trick during the game, the producer is likely to shy away from crowd shots. So do it before the game. If it embarrasses Andy Noel to action, good.

TV is also a sucker for bare skin. Bring back the C-O-R-N-E-L-L navels. It's a good recruiting tool, too.

Harvard is the game to plead for all red and white wardrobe.

"It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents--except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness."
 --Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, Paul Clifford (1830)

[billhoward]

[quote Trotsky]

So you're asking me to leave my

C antabs
S uck.
T hat's
V eritas.

sign at home?[/quote]

Awesome. Maybe you can paste something over Sucks to get you in the door. (Or "Sucks" gets applied afterwards.) Sort of like pasties or a tear-away jersey. But it ain't gonna get you televised.

[billhoward]

If you're thinking presidential ...

SHOOTING ACCURACY
Man Up - Matt Moulson
Man Down - Dick Cheney
Go Red! Spray Harvard

[Beeeej]

Y'know, Bill, there are some decaffeinated brands on the market now that taste just like the real thing.

Beeeej

[DeltaOne81]

[quote Beeeej]Y'know, Bill, there are some decaffeinated brands on the market now that taste just like the real thing.[/quote]

Yes, but I think we need some de-lame-inated brands in this case, as I don't think caffeine is the problem.

[ugarte]

[quote Trotsky]
It's Turin.  It's not Torino.  It wasn't the Moscova Olympics, it wasn't the ÁèÞíá Olympica, so it isn't Torino.

Also, there are other countries competing than the US.  However, do put the Johnson sisters curling team on more, because they are cute.[/quote]That is a great pair of sentiments. Respect our language, NBC ... but stop paying so much attention to our athletes!

FWIW, I agree with the latter sentiment and wish more attention was paid to the low profile sports we aren't as good at.

As to the former, I'm glad a plucky little Italian city told the IOC "We don't speak English here. Call us by our name." I've always thought it was odd that people rename places into their native language.

[Beeeej]

In other creative chanting news:

http://sports.espn.go.com/ncb/news/story?id=2327578

"creativeness"?!

Beeeej

[cth95]

One of the benefits of living on the Canadian border.  CBC does a far better job of carrying a variety of sports than NBC, and they spend much more time broadcasting the sports instead of athlete profiles.  You can also catch many events live on Canadian TV.  They actually broadcast a wide variety of international sporting events throughout the year.