Colgate Freshman Fun

Now as much as I hate reading blogs (it's not Smyth's)--

[colgate.blogs.com]

Enjoy the reading. I know I did.

Check this out as well (along the same lines)...
[www.maroon-news.com]

Heh. Considering the contents, I think "Why going to a Colgate hockey game is a miserable experience" would have been a more appropriate title.

Wow, that was a disappointingly boring blog entry. Additionally, he didn't come close to expounding the title of this entry.

"I went to a hockey game vs. a school I hate. It was a good game, but we lost. The end." Gripping.

Before Saturday night's game, I disliked Cornell because, you know, it was the thing to do. I'm at Colgate; not liking Cornell goes hand-in-hand with that. But now, I can't stand it, that fake Ivy.

This was interesting. I know they have an irrational hate of Cornell, and most of it seems to stem with the obsession/complex about the whole Ivy thing. The t-shirts are a good example. "Ivy doesn't mean anything on ice." Well, the ECAC is a bigger deal to me, that's true. But it means something on the gridiron, since all the Ivy League is is an athletic conference. However, I didn't know hating Cornell is "the thing to do" on that campus. I like the hockey relationship our schools have, but when we play for football, I don't have any feeling one way or another...I at least don't distinguish them from Bucknell, Lehigh, and the other Patriot League schools in terms of game importance.

Of the Colgate people I've tried to rationally meet, most usually retreat to their shield of hate when they realize they let their guard down and almost treated me like a person. I really want to classify them as a decent academic school, but just judging from the people I've met and observed through their hockey fandom, it's hard to do. I'm sure others like to paint us the same way.

The game started late because the Cornell uniforms had gotten to Colgate late (yeah, right).

What possible advantage could a road team attain by faking the delivery of uniforms? If anything, it made us hurried in getting dressed.

[q]And while Cornell fans spend much of the game calling the opposing goalie a "siv" (since the goalie lets everything through - I think Martha Stewart made that one up), we should degrade the opposing goalie by calling him "mesh" or "Swiss cheese" or something else with holes.[/q]

The "siv" chant is by far our most devastating.

[q]I gotta say, whoever came up with some of those chants was brilliant. Among my favorites: "You're all ugly," "Where is Waldo?" (their band wore red-and-white striped shirts), "Jump in the gorge," "SUNY Ithaca," "hoootel maaanagement," and then there was the one directed towards the one girl on our side wearing bright red, "That girl sucks."[/q]

Those cheers were so original

I actually wouldn't mind if Colgate fans got more organized and less drunk, but they should do it for more than the Cornell game.

[q]And while Cornell fans spend much of the game calling the opposing goalie a "siv" (since the goalie lets everything through - I think Martha Stewart made that one up), we should degrade the opposing goalie by calling him "mesh" or "Swiss cheese" or something else with holes.[/q]

First, the punchline: "Something else with holes...Like a Colgate mother?"

2) s-i-e-v-e.

3) The word sieve is so universal and engrained in the college game that anyone who thinks we or Martha Stewart originated it are so obviously college hockey newbies. Go back and watch your squeakball.

4) That's actually a good column. But, now they've joined Harvard on the list of schools that have had newspaper columnists BEGGING for their fans to cheer like our fans.

redhair34
Check this out as well (along the same lines)...
[www.maroon-news.com]

Actually a good article, if I were trying to duplicate the Lynah environment it's basically what I would say.

The article should have been titled, "Why I hate Colgate's handling of tickets for the Cornell hockey game." That or "Mein Kampf II: Even More Boringer"

From a friend at the game, the band's responses:

"Where is Waldo?" "With your mother"
"Hotel management" "Hotel janitors"
"SUNY Ithaca" "SUNY rejects"

French Rage
From a friend at the game, the band's responses:

"Where is Waldo?" "With your mother"
"Hotel management" "Hotel janitors"
"SUNY Ithaca" "SUNY rejects"

And another, from before the game started:

Colgate drunkards...er...students: "We're number one."

Our response (which I started, but which was immediately picked up by the Faithful): "Not much longer."
Andy W.

The most gratifying part of the game was taunting the drunken morons as they filed out of the game by walking in front of and around our section. The look on the face of the jackass (usher) in front of section 13 when McCutcheon dealt Colgate a dagger in the heart was a close second.

Redhair34--

It sounds like we were sitting pretty close to each other. Were you one of the people in the front row (A), who brought the sign that was later stolen and destroyed? If so, I was in the row behind you. I was the guy who tried to force the usher to go after the sign. That usher was a real piece of work.
Andy W.

>>> OK, back to the main story. So we waited in the annals of Reid in the hallways by the visiting teams' locker rooms (coincidentally, the women's basketball team had a game against Bucknell, so they had to make it through us to get to their room). In an excellent show of planning, guess who happened to show up as we waited? The Cornell hockey team, decked out in bright red sweatsuits, of course. They had to work their way past our line Colgaters, all the while ignoring the warm-up heckles of us students.

"Annals"? Am I missing an alternative usage beyond journal or chronological record?

We shouldn't poke too much fun of Colgate: but for a couple questions on the SATs we guessed right on ...

Also, Colgate makes New York State hockey look good. Most weekends. Too bad Syracuse doesn't have a D1 team. Well, there's RIT and who knows ...

andyw2100

French Rage
From a friend at the game, the band's responses:

"Where is Waldo?" "With your mother"
"Hotel management" "Hotel janitors"
"SUNY Ithaca" "SUNY rejects"

And another, from before the game started:

Colgate drunkards...er...students: "We're number one."

Our response (which I started, but which was immediately picked up by the Faithful): "Not much longer."
Andy W.

and my friend's favorite:
them: "you're all virgins"
us responding with "that's not what your mom said"

The only Colgate cheer that I might remotely consider agreeing with is:

"You're all ugly"

Haha.. I'm sorry, I don't mean to offend anyone here. I grew up in Hawaii and when I came to Cornell, I learned that there is a different threshold of ugliness in the air about this place. Sure there certainly are some good-looking men and women here at Cornell. But speaking in generality, I am willing to admit the slight truthfulness of the Colgate-invented statement that we don't quite exactly have the world's most beautiful bunch of academicians here at Cornell. Hiking through Ho Plaza to class everyday, I have never caught a possible visual of any Brad Pitt-resembling beings or any could-be Adriana Lima clones.

Well, in my opinion, the hypocritical toothpaste men and women aren't any less unattractive than we are. They do, however, have a great sense of unified shamelessness that we could never hope to match in a dozen decades. Other than that, Colgate is just a bunch of insignificant jealous idiots with collectively insufficient brain matter to organize themselves to give a good solid support for their #2 hockey team. They also think their fairy school is good enough now to suddenly declare themselves our magical rival. I wish I could tell their pathetic fans that we're not gonna lower ourselves to their dirty, unaccomplished level. We don't rival garbage. It's a waste of time.

Again, I am just playing their game right here. Putting aside ethics and morality, anything goes. The more insults, the better. Ok, sorry for the long and totally inappropriate rant. After I almost got hit by a flying pizza in Starr Rink that time, I could never have any respect for Colgate fans again in my life. Wondering if getting hit by a flying pizza would be a lawsuit..

Well, these ridiculous articles are nothing but horrible jokes on themselves (and their own one-side imaginary rivalry).

Oat
we don't quite exactly have the world's most beautiful bunch of academicians here at Cornell

We are from Long Island. We buy our looks later.

(But Colgate students are hardly ones to talk. Quinnipiac, on the other hand...)

[Q]Don't shy away from calling Cornell defenseman Dan Glover "a poor man's Samuel L. Jackson"[/Q]

I have to admit, that's funny

billhoward
Also, Colgate makes New York State hockey look good. Most weekends. Too bad Syracuse doesn't have a D1 team. Well, there's RIT and who knows ...

Well, the winningest team in the history of college hockey is in Upstate New York...

Oat
They also think their fairy school is good enough now to suddenly declare themselves our magical rival.

Well, if it's a fairy school, who knows what magical powers it has.

andyw2100
And another, from before the game started:

Colgate drunkards...er...students: "We're number one."

Our response (which I started, but which was immediately picked up by the Faithful): "Not much longer."

Aw, c'mon...

"You look like NUMBER TWO!"

It's grade-school enough that they might actually get it.

[q]We shouldn't poke too much fun of Colgate: but for a couple questions on the SATs we guessed right on ... [/q]Speak for yourself.

KeithK
[q]We shouldn't poke too much fun of Colgate: but for a couple questions on the SATs we guessed right on ... [/q]Speak for yourself.

Seriously. Some of us got lots of skinny envelopes ... and it wasn't SAT related.

KeithK
[q]We shouldn't poke too much fun of Colgate: but for a couple questions on the SATs we guessed right on ... [/q]Speak for yourself.

To this day I suspect my application got caught in a gust of wind when someone momentarily opened a window and it blew off the tall Reject pile, made a neat barrel roll, and fell into the shorter Accept basket. Maybe it wasn't seen, maybe it was and someone on the committee believed in kismet. I'm sure I'm the only person who has that nightmare, along with the one about returning to campus for a game and being asked for an overdue paper. Now I have to worry about the faux pas of wearing a white shirt with red when it's supposed to be a red shirt with white. Or is that why there's Ask Ezra?

I remember hearing the "we found Waldo" chant multiple times at away games but never heard us chant back. Any ideas? I was thinking "we found your reading level."

Good effort. That usher was an utter ass. I am not quite sure what his purpose was other than to look sullen and try to throw one of us out and stay off the dole.

Did you see when one of their drunk fans threw water at our band and hit their rent a cop? She was furious as she headed into the stands and was probably heartbroken when she was told that it wasn't us.

-WillR

WillR
Good effort. That usher was an utter ass. I am not quite sure what his purpose was other than to look sullen and try to throw one of us out and stay off the dole.
-WillR

I'm the guy he tried to throw out. Well, at least I am one of them.

After the sign incident, one of the guys in front of me called the girlfriend of the effeminate schmuck in the first row in the section next to us a whore. The usher immediately warned him that he couldn't do that. I piped in, and asked, "We can't say 'whore', but they can call us douchebags, and worse?" The usher replied that he could not call one person a whore, implying that it was not the word that he found offensive, but the way it was directed at one person. So the next time it was a little quiet, I yelled over to the same woman, something like, "He's sorry. You're --not-- a whore." The usher immediately charged over to me, and said, "Come with me." When I refused, he told me again, to come with him. I continued to refuse. He went and got a pseudo-cop, and explained to the cop that I was "yanking his chain." In fact, I was yanking his chain, because it deserved yanking. You could almost see the smoke coming out of his ears when, after I told the cop what happened, the cop said basically, "watch it", and walked off.

Good times.
Andy W.

andyw2100

WillR
Good effort. That usher was an utter ass. I am not quite sure what his purpose was other than to look sullen and try to throw one of us out and stay off the dole.
-WillR

I'm the guy he tried to throw out. Well, at least I am one of them.

After the sign incident, one of the guys in front of me called the girlfriend of the effeminate schmuck in the first row in the section next to us a whore. The usher immediately warned him that he couldn't do that. I piped in, and asked, "We can't say 'whore', but they can call us douchebags, and worse?" The usher replied that he could not call one person a whore, implying that it was not the word that he found offensive, but the way it was directed at one person. So the next time it was a little quiet, I yelled over to the same woman, something like, "He's sorry. You're --not-- a whore." The usher immediately charged over to me, and said, "Come with me." When I refused, he told me again, to come with him. I continued to refuse. He went and got a pseudo-cop, and explained to the cop that I was "yanking his chain." In fact, I was yanking his chain, because it deserved yanking. You could almost see the smoke coming out of his ears when, after I told the cop what happened, the cop said basically, "watch it", and walked off.

Good times.
Andy W.

Obviously, you chose the wrong course of action.

What you should have done was call everyone in that section a whore. Hey, it's not directed at one person, right?

In other words,

For when the One Great Scorer comes
To write against your name,
He marks - not that you won or lost -
But that you yanked their chain.

Dekanich is now posting on Smyth's blog... for a laugh notice that he has to explain to a colgate fan how the travel partner system works

[colgate.blogs.com]

nr53
Dekanich is now posting on Smyth's blog... for a laugh notice that he has to explain to a colgate fan how the travel partner system works

[colgate.blogs.com]

>>> [Dekanich] As for Cornell having an easier schedule than us, we are actually travel partners and I believe that we play the exact same teams for the remainder of the season.

He "believes"?

But give Colgate this: Their players are out and about online. Given the volume and wackiness (wacko-ness occasionally) of eLynah, one can see how Mike Schafer would say not to read what's written about you ... and yet, if you can take a body check in the corners, maybe you could handle seeing what's posted, too.

billhoward
>>> [Dekanich] As for Cornell having an easier schedule than us, we are actually travel partners and I believe that we play the exact same teams for the remainder of the season.

He "believes"?

Well, if he isn't keeping too close track of the schedule, he might believe there are NC games in addition to the remaining ECAC schedule. I think you should cut him a little slack on this.

Kyle

It's because of this bright question: "Cornell seems to have an easier schedule from here on out".

Haha, so funny you dont even have to respond.

And grade school enough that you thought of it.

Siv? surely he must have known it was sieve?

Trotsky

Oat
we don't quite exactly have the world's most beautiful bunch of academicians here at Cornell

We are from Long Island. We buy our looks later.

(But Colgate students are hardly ones to talk. Quinnipiac, on the other hand...)

I believe that the University of Chicago has the ugliest people.

[maroon.uchicago.edu]

jtwcornell91

Oat
They also think their fairy school is good enough now to suddenly declare themselves our magical rival.

Well, if it's a fairy school, who knows what magical powers it has.

Post of the year.

min
the University of Chicago has the ugliest people.

[maroon.uchicago.edu]

Only ten schools and 350 students (no males) are compared: [collegecuteness.com]

From most to least cute:

Albion (not the one in London)
MSU
U Oregon
Vandy
Michigan
Princeton
UCLA
Stanford
Puget Sound
Chicago

I have every confidence, particlarly if they included males, that we could "beat" any of those schools.

Of course, another way to have done this would be to simply reverse-order the schools' entrance requirements...

Rich S
And grade school enough that you thought of it.

Hey, I have a couple of grade-school-aged kids. I hear stuff like this all the time. And of course, they think they invented it

Trotsky
Of course, another way to have done this would be to simply reverse-order the schools' entrance requirements...

That is a hell of a lot of respect for Puget Sound.

French Rage
It's because of this bright question: "Cornell seems to have an easier schedule from here on out".

Haha, so funny you dont even have to respond.

Clearly his belief that Cornell will have an easier schedule the rest of the way refers to non-ECAC games and means that he believes Cornell will play lower ranked opponents in the playoffs because we will finish in first place.

Trotsky

min
the University of Chicago has the ugliest people.
[maroon.uchicago.edu]

Only ten schools and 350 students (no males) are compared: [collegecuteness.com]
From most to least cute:
Albion (not the one in London)
MSU
U Oregon
Vandy
Michigan
Princeton
UCLA
Stanford
Puget Sound
Chicago

I have every confidence, particlarly if they included males, that we could "beat" any of those schools.
Of course, another way to have done this would be to simply reverse-order the schools' entrance requirements...

When he wrote a column for Fortune, Daniel Seligman opined that the best looking women went to a) Harvard or b) UCLA. The theory: Good looking women married rich men and their children had a better than average chance of being cute and smart and ending up in Cambridge. Or: For the last century, good looking men and women gravitated to Los Angeles in hopes of being in the films. Even those who didn't make the silver screen wound up staying, resulting in a hot hot hot gene pool whose offspring helped populate UCLA and USC.

It's a very likeable theory. Who knows if it's right. Could an Uma Thurman lookalike breed the ugly-with-a-capital-U out of a CalTech geek?

[edit]In a 2005 column (he's now writing for Forbes), Seligman touches on how the Rotschilds started out rich and ugly, or ugly then rich, and through careful or fortunate marriages to attractive women (an ugly poor man is ugly, an ugly rich man is rich) [www.forbes.com] wound up good looking ... "The family founders, in 18th-century Frankfurt, were supremely ugly, but several generations later, after successive marriages to supremely beautiful women, the men in the family were indistinguishable from movie stars. The Rothschild effect, as you could call it, is well established in sociology research: Men everywhere want to marry beautiful women, and women everywhere want socially dominant (i.e., intelligent) husbands. When competent men marry pretty women, the couple tends to have children above average in both competence and looks.}"

billhoward
Could an Uma Thurman lookalike breed the ugly-with-a-capital-U out of a CalTech geek?

Terrible example, as Uma Thurman would only exacerbate it.

Hirz89
Siv? surely he must have known it was sieve?

i am shocked by the number of people who have asked me what a sieve is. these are college student people. prior to ever hearing it in the context of cornell hockey, my little brother (i'm talking middle school here) knew what a sieve was...

min
I believe that the University of Chicago has the ugliest people.
[maroon.uchicago.edu]

wow. that is an unbelievably offensive article. i understand what they are trying to get at, but honestly...

(BTW, this is not directed to anyone here...i am just talking about the article)

LynahFaithfulS

Hirz89
Siv? surely he must have known it was sieve?

i am shocked by the number of people who have asked me what a sieve is. these are college student people. prior to ever hearing it in the context of cornell hockey, my little brother (i'm talking middle school here) knew what a sieve was...

I'll be honest with you, I needed a bit of a refresher on the word myself when I first heard it at games this year. When you don't spend much of your life baking food in the kitchen, it's not necessarily something that's part of your vocabulary.

I think the first time I ever heard "sieve" at a hockey game was freshman year of high school. If we hadn't been discussing that particular word for some reason the day before in an English class, I wouldn't have know what it meant. However, I would hope that college students anywhere would know how to spell and understand the word.

LynahFaithfulS

min
I believe that the University of Chicago has the ugliest people.
[maroon.uchicago.edu]

wow. that is an unbelievably offensive article. i understand what they are trying to get at, but honestly...

It's funny if you begin with the assumption that the entire issue is absurd, the authors realize this, and they are making a point in parody. If you begin with the assumption that this is an untouchably radioactive subject which admits of no humor at all, then, naturally, it will not amuse.

(i.e., Q. How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? A. That's not funny.)

Whatever the perspective, the best line in the entire article, however, is: "They are no longer together."

imafrshmn
When you don't spend much of your life baking food in the kitchen, it's not necessarily something that's part of your vocabulary.

i know the word from playing with a sieve in the sandbox

(preemptive comment: it's true, it wasn't meant for the sandbox...it was labeled as a toy for the beach)


i really don't mean to be insulting anyone, i just didn't think it was that uncommon a word...apparently i was wrong

All males (all females, too, actually) should learn to do laundry and cook while in high school.

a) so you don't do your first load of wash at Cornell with hot water, soap, and chlorine bleach while filling the laundry tub with your a) white underwear and b) new red Cornell T-shirts. Artists learn about additive and subtractive colors ... but red and white laundry combines to make pink laundry.

b1) you will impress your girlfriends with your ability to cook. It's their own damn fault if they have faulty logic circuits and believe, "He cooked for me now ... he's not a bad cook ... [faulty leap:] he'll cook after we're living together / married and that's awesome."
b2) at some point you will learn that the intentionally leaky thing into which you pour cooked pasta (not canned ravioli) is called a colander or sieve.

I'm with you on this one.

I often teach middle school kids plus coach peewees and they think a lot of what they say is so "cool". And some of it is.

But a lot isn't.

HS kids think they invented EVERYTHING!

I feel that it is somewhat reasonable not to know what a sieve is--after all, most people use the word colander when referring to the thing with which they drain pasta. If we hadn't read Nectar in a Sieve in high school, I doubt I would have known the meaning of the word because it doesn't seem to be a commonly used word (outside of hockey, of course).

It's like asking someone to dice up an aubergine--how many would know which vegetable to grab?

I thought "aubergine" was the hardware store that used to advertise between periods.

Molly
It's like asking someone to dice up an aubergine--how many would know which vegetable to grab?

Depends. What continent did they grow up on?

ugarte

Molly
It's like asking someone to dice up an aubergine--how many would know which vegetable to grab?

Depends. What continent did they grow up on?

Can I get that garnished with some rocket?

Molly
It's like asking someone to dice up an aubergine--how many would know which vegetable to grab?

A couple of years ago in Berlin we were phone in a pizza order, and the Austrian placing the call ordered "eine Pizza mit Melanzane"; the guy taking the order was confused, so so she clarified: "Oh, Entschuldigung. Auberginen."

jtwcornell91

Molly
It's like asking someone to dice up an aubergine--how many would know which vegetable to grab?

A couple of years ago in Berlin we were phone in a pizza order, and the Austrian placing the call ordered "eine Pizza mit Melanzane"; the guy taking the order was confused, so so she clarified: "Oh, Entschuldigung. Auberginen."

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!

Beeeej

Beeeej

jtwcornell91

Molly
It's like asking someone to dice up an aubergine--how many would know which vegetable to grab?

A couple of years ago in Berlin we were phone in a pizza order, and the Austrian placing the call ordered "eine Pizza mit Melanzane"; the guy taking the order was confused, so so she clarified: "Oh, Entschuldigung. Auberginen."

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!

Beeeej

Yes, I was amused to learn that just as the Swiss pepper their German with French words, the Austrians use Italian loan words.

Also,

STOP PUTTING MATT AT THE END OF YOUR POSTS!!!

Beeeej
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!

Trotsky

Beeeej
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!

Typical.

RichH

Trotsky

Beeeej
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!

Typical.

Jerk.

jtwcornell91

RichH

Trotsky

Beeeej
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!

Typical.

Jerk.

Bâby-eater!

Trotsky

jtwcornell91

RichH

Trotsky

Beeeej
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!

Typical.

Jerk.

Bâby-eater!

I can't believe I wasn't at my computer during this thread. Good work all around.

jtwcornell91
STOP PUTTING MATT AT THE END OF YOUR POSTS!!!

Heh.

jtwcornell91
STOP PUTTING MATT AT THE END OF YOUR POSTS!!!

Um, what?

Beeeej

Beeeej

jtwcornell91
STOP PUTTING MATT AT THE END OF YOUR POSTS!!!

Um, what?

Beeeej

See: USCHO Fan Forum

French Rage

Beeeej

jtwcornell91
STOP PUTTING MATT AT THE END OF YOUR POSTS!!!

Um, what?

See: USCHO Fan Forum

Care to be more specific? I visit the USCHO Fan Forum about once every never, and have no desire to sift through a hundred threads until I find the one that will allow me to get the joke.

Beeeej

Beeeej

French Rage

Beeeej

jtwcornell91
STOP PUTTING MATT AT THE END OF YOUR POSTS!!!

Um, what?

See: USCHO Fan Forum

Care to be more specific? I visit the USCHO Fan Forum about once every never, and have no desire to sift through a hundred threads until I find the one that will allow me to get the joke.

Can I guess? I'd like to guess. I am guessing.

I think that some folks on USCHO get exercised about people signing their posts within the text of the post. Some regular went batshit on a dude named Matt.

Am I right?

Love and kisses,
ugarte

ugarte

Beeeej

French Rage

Beeeej

jtwcornell91
STOP PUTTING MATT AT THE END OF YOUR POSTS!!!

Um, what?

See: USCHO Fan Forum

Care to be more specific? I visit the USCHO Fan Forum about once every never, and have no desire to sift through a hundred threads until I find the one that will allow me to get the joke.

Can I guess? I'd like to guess. I am guessing.

I think that some folks on USCHO get exercised about people signing their posts within the text of the post. Some regular went batshit on a dude named Matt.

Am I right?

Love and kisses,
ugarte

And then Matt put "STOP PUTTING MATT AT THE END OF YOUR POSTS!" in his signature, and continued signing his posts in addition to that. Other than that, you guessed it perfectly.

A sieve is also what prospectors used panning for gold. And I believe it's one of several terms used for separating other rocks/sand/minerals although screen is more commonly used.

Aubergine is a bit more obscure although if you know your fashion colors you could probably figure out which is the purple vegetable.

jmh30
And then Matt put "STOP PUTTING MATT AT THE END OF YOUR POSTS!" in his signature, and continued signing his posts in addition to that.

I'm not a big fan of people signing their posts, but Matt is awesome.

Good points--I probably should have used a better example, but I had eggplants on the mind at that time...

I grew up calling the thing we strained pasta in a collander - a bowl with holes in it. The thing that looked like a small bowl or cup made of window screen with a heavy wire handle was a seive. It was good for sifting flour and powdered sugar and for removing the lumps from granulated sugar. It was fun to play with in the sand box, too, where the lumps that we separated from the sand had been left by the neighborhood cats.