Dartmouth goalies- I'm in your head.

Dan Yacey (#1)
· Height: 6-0
· Weight: 175
· Position: Goalie
· Class: Freshman
· Hometown: Fort Saskatchewan, Alta.
· Birthday: June 9, 1982
Personal: Yacey names The Matrix and Dumb and Dumber as his favorite movies. He lists the Toronto Maple Leafs’ Curtis Joseph and the Anaheim Mighty Ducks’ Paul Kariya as his favorite NHL players. Yacey enjoys watching Hockey Night in Canada and The Simpsons.
Darren Gastrock (#25)
· Height: 5-10
· Weight: 160
· Position: Goalie
· Class: Sophomore
· Hometown: Anchorage, Alaska
· Birthday: April 11, 1980
Nick Boucher (#35)
· Height: 5-11
· Weight: 175
· Position: Goalie
· Class: Junior
· Hometown: Cobble Hill, B.C.
Birthday: December 29, 1980
Personal: Boucher lists the Edmonton Oilers as his favorite NHL team and future Hall of Famer Grant Fuhr as his favorite player. Boucher lists Black Sheep and Tommy Boy as his favorite films.

Insults.

A guy with your IQ should have a low voice too!
A half-wit gave you a piece of his mind, and you held on to it.
After meeting you, I've decided I am in favor of abortion in cases of incest.
All of your ancestors must number in the millions; it's hard to believe that many people are to blame for producing you.
All that you are you owe to your parents. Why don't you send them a penny and square the account?
Any similarity between you and a human is purely coincidental!
Anyone who told you to be yourself couldn't have given you worse advice.
Are you always so stupid or is today a special occasion?
Are you brain-dead?
Are your parents siblings?
As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?
Before you came along we were hungry. Now we are fed up.
Believe me, I don't want to make a monkey out of you. Why should I take all the credit?
Better at sex than anyone, now all he needs is a partner.
Brains aren't everything. In fact, in your case they're nothing!
Calling you stupid would be an insult to stupid people.
Can I borrow your face for a few days while my ass is on vacation?
Careful now, don't let your brains go to your head!
Did the mental hospital test too many drugs on you today?
Did you eat paint chips when you were a kid?
Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home?
Did your parents have any children that lived?
Do you ever wonder what life would be like if you'd had enough oxygen at birth?
Do you want do die stupid?
Doesn't know the meaning of the word fear, but then again he doesn't know the meaning of most words.
Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent!
Don't let your mind wander -- it's too little to be let out alone.
Don't think, it may sprain your brain!
Don't you have a terribly empty feeling ---- in your skull?
Don't you love nature, despite what it did to you?
Don't you need a license to be that ugly?
Ever since I saw you in your family tree I've wanted to cut it down.
Everyone is gifted. Some open the package sooner.
Excellent time to become a missing person.
For two cents I'd give you a piece of my mind - and all of yours.
Forgot to pay his brain bill.
Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It'll only take 10 seconds.
Grasp your ears firmly and remove your head from your ass.
Has reached rock bottom and shows signs of starting to dig.
Has the IQ of lint. (Thanks, Stan Tees)
Have you considered suing your brains for nonsupport?
He has one brain cell, and it is fighting for dominance.
He is always lost in thought -- it's unfamiliar territory.
He is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
He is living proof that man can live without a brain!
He is the kind of a man that you would use as a blueprint to build an idiot.
He's not stupid; he's possessed by a retarded ghost.
He's so dense that light bends around him.
He's the only man who, if told to screw himself, could do it.
He's the reason brothers and sisters shouldn't marry.
How did you get here? Did someone leave your cage open?
How many years did it take you to learn how to breathe?
I always wanted to be a troubleshooter but now I see you are not worth it!
I believe in respect for the dead; in fact I could only respect you if you WERE dead.
I bet your brain feels as good as new, seeing that you've never used it.
I bet your mother has a loud bark!
I certainly hope you are sterile.
I don't consider you a vulture. I consider you something a vulture would eat.
I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
I don't think you are a fool. But then what's MY opinion against thousands of others?
I don't want you to turn the other cheek. It's just as ugly.
I hear the only place you're ever invited is outside.
I hear you are very kind to animals so please give that face back to the gorilla.
I hear you changed your mind! What did you do with the diaper?
I hear you were born on a farm. Any more in the litter?
I hear you were born on April 2; a day too late!
I heard that your brother was an only child.
I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you!
I heard you went to have your head examined but the doctors found nothing there.
I know you are nobody's fool but maybe someone will adopt you.
I know you're a self-made man. It's nice of you to take the blame!
I know you're not as stupid as you look. Nobody could be!
I want nothing out of you but breathing, and very little of that!
I will defend to your death my right to my opinion.
I would ask you how old you are but I know you can't count that high.
I would have liked to insult you, but with your intelligence you wouldn't get offended.
I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.
If I ever need a brain transplant, I'd choose yours because I'd want a brain that had never been used.
If I had a face like yours, I'd sue my parents!
If I want any shit outta you I'll squeeze your head.
If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.
If manure were music, you'd be a brass band.
If you ever tax your brain, don't charge more than a penny.
If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you get change back.
If you had another brain like the one you've got, you'd still be a half-wit.
If you ever tax your brain, don't charge more than a penny.
If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you get change back.
If you had another brain like the one you've got, you'd still be a half-wit.
If you were twice as smart, you'd still be stupid.
Ignorance can be cured. Stupid is forever.
In the land of the witless, the half-wit is king.
Instead of being born again, why don't you just grow up?
It is mind over matter. I don't mind, because you don't matter.
I've seen people like you, but I had to pay admission!
Judging by the old saying, "What you don't know can't hurt you," he's practically invulnerable.
Learn from your parents' mistakes - use birth control!
Let's play horse. I'll be the front end and you be yourself.
Let's play house. You be the door and I'll slam you.
Look, don't go to a mind reader; go to a palmist; I know you've got a palm.
Man alive! But I wish you weren't.
No one will ever know that you've had a lobotomy, if you wear a wig to hide to the scars and learn to control the slobbering.
Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time.
Ordinarily people live and learn. You just live.
People can't say that you have absolutely nothing! After all, you have inferiority!
People say that you are the perfect idiot. I say that you are not perfect but you are doing all right.
Perhaps your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
Slit your wrists - it will lower your blood pressure.
The inbreeding is certainly obvious in your family.
The next time you shave, could you stand a little closer to the razor?
There is no vaccine against stupidity.
They just invented a new coffin just for you that goes over the head. It's for people who are dead from the neck up.
They said you were a great asset. I told them they were off by two letters.
When you die, I'd like to go to your funeral but I'll probably have to go to work that day. I believe in business before pleasure.
When you die, you should have your brain donated to science. I hear they're trying to come up with the perfect vacuum.
For his sister/mom:
She could eat a watermelon through a picket fence!
She had a mouth dirtier than a wicker toilet seat.
She has a nice butter face. Everything looks nice, but her face.
She thinks the rearview mirror is for putting on make-up.
She was another one of his near Mrs.
She's a lot like train tracks - she's been laid across the country.
She's got a body that won't quit and a brain that won't start.
She's got more chins than the Hong Kong telephone book.
She's like Taco Bell. When people see her, they run for the border.
She's so ugly they used to put a pot roast in her lap so the dog would play with her.
She's so ugly, she'd make a freight train take a dirt road!

Yo A.J. - do some work or something. . .

let me guess, Adam = Bored

I’m working, but my Orgo book just doesn’t want to open. Kinda funny, my Biochem book won’t open either! How am I supposed to do work if my books don’t feel like opening? I’ll try to tickle them.

Sheee-it. Biochem is far more fun than Orgo.

what??? nahhhh. orgo is the greatest (says the one who does it fo a living!)!!!

Why not just yell "Dumb and Dumber" at the guy?

And, um, John, maybe it's just me, but I pine for the day when the probability of seeing that statistic/bikini signature is insignificant.

I agree. Organic is definitely better than biochemistry.